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#819: «Five-Minute Comics: Part 1»
 
Because of a family illness, instead of regular comics, this week I'll be sharing some strips that I drew as part of a game I played with friends. Each comic had to be written and drawn in five minutes. -- Randall

----Comic #1----
[A man and a woman stand facing each other.]
Man: Jupiter will make its closest approach to Earth in decades.

[The man points behind the woman, and the woman turns around.]
Man: In fact, here it comes now!

[Jupiter, about the size of the characters' heads, hovers into the frame at about head-height.]
Jupiter: Hey, guys.

[Jupiter continues to hover through the frame as the characters watch it go.]
Jupiter: Anyone need a gravitational slingshot?
Woman: No, I'm good.
Jupiter: Aight.

----Comic #2----
[A man sits on a box, playing a guitar.]
Man: ...Now I don't blame him 'cause he ran and hid, -- but the meanest thing that he ever did -- was before he left, he went and named me "Trig."

----Comic #3----
[A man looks down a well.]
Man: Oh God, a little girl is trapped down this well!

[The man runs off screen.]

[He returns, leading a pony.]
Man: It's okay, we got you that pony you always wanted!

[He tries to cram the pony down the well with the aid of a large stick.]
Man: Get... in... there... -- Ugh!

----Comic #4----
[A man and a woman stand in a server room.]
Man: I like to get back to nature by coming out here to the server room. -- The warmth, the whirr of the drives, the drone of the fans, the howl of the wolves...
Woman: Wolves?
Man: Yeah, we started a reintroduction program.

----Comic #5----
[A man stands by himself in the frame.]
Man: Yo momma's so masculine that she... oh, wait, that's your dad. -- Is your mom the lady over by the door? Aww, she looks nice!

----Comic #6----
[A man runs toward another man who is wearing a powdered wig, holding a gun in one hand, and a flute in the other. Behind him, someone is chasing him on a motorcycle.]
Man: Bach, activate the magic flute and teleport us home! Wagner's right behind me on his Ring Cycle!

----Comic #7----
Hotness Ratings:
[A close up of a woman with wavy hair.]
Incredily made-up girl on magazine cover.
(Inset of a man: "Meh."

[An average girl.]
Girl in your bio class.
(Inset of man: "Two stars.")

[Girl with mussed hair in over-sized men's shirt.]
Girl in your bio class wearing one of your shirts.
Girl: Want some breakfast?
(Inset man: "Four stars."

[Girl with another sort of shirt speaking to an older lady.]
Girl in your bio class wearing one of your mom's shirts.
Girl: Thanks for the great night.
(Inset man: "Wat!")

[Creepy-looking girl.]
Girl in your bio class wearing your mom's skin like a suit.
Girl: Give Mommy a hug!
(Inset man, screaming: "AAAAAAAA")

 
        
The wolves thin the RAID arrays, removing the slowest and weakest disks to keep the average seek speed high.